You might get a sense of me by looking at the following: |
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Resume |
Some of the many articles I think are interesting |
What I want to get out of grad school |
Some of my old life before grad school |
a, an, and the come to mind...
The Internet Argument Corpus
A Persona-Based Neural Conversation Model
Robots talking (more or less)
(I think I shouldn't link to this one) TickTock: A non-goal-oriented multimodal dialog system with engagement awareness
Chatbot Evaluation and Database Expansion via Crowdsourcing
A Wizard-of-Oz Study on A Non-Task-Oriented Dialog Systems That Reacts to User Engagement
The list is long. I would like to make a chatbot that can communicate about politics to bring us more together as a nation. I also want to lose lots of sleep working on projects with artifical deadlines.
You might get a sense of my lack of humor by looking at the following: (in no particular order) |
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Why do you like to stand outside? |
What's up with gravity? |
Are you a "real" doctor? |
Do you like Bizzaro? |
Should you check your spelling? |
Science trivia |
Let's Think |
Then if anyone asks, you can say I'm "out-standing."
Nothing! Gravity Sucks!
no
...but I know more about immunology than "Dr." Rand Paul, but that isn't saying much - even Howard Stern knows more about immunolgy than "Dr." Rand Paul.
What is your favorite demonstration?
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
I like to blow things up, but blowing the whole UNIVERSE up? It's totally mind blowing, man. Of course, I'll probably be dead for tax reasons...
What do you think of drones?
They just go on and on and on.
Oh, you mean those things that fly... Yeah, I made one of those, but the stupid pilot kept crashing it and I got tired of fixing it. Yeah, I was the lousy pilot. My Bad.
Doctor Science, can you tell me what's wrong with me?
Yes!
...but you don't want to know.
Nobel Prize winning physicist, Richard Feynman once wrote a book called: "What Do You Care What Other People Think? So, what do you think?
I don't.
That same Nobel Prize winning physicist, Richard Feyman, wrote another book called: "Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feyman?" Was he joking?
No, he wasn't, but he should have taken more chemistry.
I should explain this more, because no one ever seems to get it. The problem, of course, is that if you have to explain the joke, it no longer is funny. Or more accurately, it was never funny to begin with. Anyway, the title of the book comes from a time when Dr. Feyman was asked if he wanted lemon or milk in his tea. He said he wanted both. The host replied, "Surely, you must be joking, Mr. Feyman." He thought he committed a social faux pas. In fact, he didn't understand some basic kitchen chemistry. That is if you mix an acid like lemon juice with milk you get curtled milk. In fact, that is one way to make cheese used in Indian dishes. So, maybe you didn't laugh, but maybe you learned something? Either about how to make cheese or about how we are all flawed.
Do you have an inventions?
We invented something we like to call the anti-ouija board - ajiuo board © ® to be more confusing. Instead of trying to ask dead people for advice, we decided to tell dead people what to do. First we tried drilling long holes in cemeteries and yelling down tubes we stuck in the holes, but the police made us stop. After years of research, we came up with the ajiuo board © ®. Granted, it only has three possible picks, but all have them have worked. They are "Don't move," "Stay dead" (sorry, you zomby lovers), and "Stay there." We tried to add "Rot" and "Decay" and "Spread your ashes out some more," but not everyone was cooperating...
Terry Pratchet once wrote a book called: "Hogfather" What is it about?
It is basically a cross between Downton Abbey and The Santa Clause with different accents and a really cool white streak of hair.
Terry Pratchet once wrote a book called: "Mort." How does it end?
IT'S TIME TO GO NOW!Time to think...
Have a question for me? email me at brschwar@ucsc.edu